'The future is female’: Female Student Bravely Challenges the Myth Spread by Her Male Peers That Her Success Stems From ‘Pretty Privilege’

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    class discussions. We recently had some presentations and one of them chose to do theirs on, to put it simply, "pretty privilege" - they specifically pointed to two papers that suggested that pretty female students get overscored in assessments. The other guys in the group snickered and one even gave me a wink. Afterwards, I heard them in the hallway joking that "they had experience with that
    via canva
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    AITA for reporting my classmates for joking that I have pretty privilege?
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    Background: I'm (F23) one of only a few female students in a male-dominated course. Furthermore, I am at a highly prestigious university and I haven't really gotten along with the guys on my course. They are all very competitive and I just don't really enjoy their company - everything turns into a p ing contest, and they definitely take me less seriously
    via u/[deleted]
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    because I'm a woman. I stopped interacting with them beyond the mere minimum and choose to hang out with other people. Anyway: I did well in our recent exams (I topped two out of four exams we had so far). Our prof congratulated me during class (I wouldn't have advertised this myself).
    via u/[deleted]
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    Ever since then, my interactions with a specific group of male classmates have gotten weird. They're now outright and challenge me aggressively in class discussions. We recently had some presentations and one of them chose to do theirs on, to put it simply, "pretty privilege" - they specifically pointed to two papers that suggested that pretty
    via u/[deleted]
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    female students get overscored in assessments. The other guys in the group snickered and one even gave me a wink. Afterwards, I heard them in the hallway joking that "they had experience with that themselves". I've been seeing a PhD student within our department for a month. He has literally nothing to do with our course. Well, we
    via u/[deleted]
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    ran into one of my course mates A together. The next day in class his friend B asked me if "my boyfriend" helped me with exams. He said this intentionally loudly and in front of the professor, who heard this. I replied that I don't have a boyfriend (cause he's not my bf), but then B pointed out that he had run into me
    via u/[deleted]
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    with the PhD student, making a point to say his name (the prof knows him). I just replied that we're only friends. They didn't let up - I heard that they discussed this thing in two more classes, in earshot of the professors. Both times they suggested I got help for my exams ( I wasn't even seeing him then). I didn't
    via u/[deleted]
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    confront them, but this has been causing me so much an ty - even without the exam accusations, I worked hard to get here and I don't want to be known among the faculty for my dating life. I raised this issue with my supervisor, without the intention of taking it any further, but I wanted her advice as a woman in academia. She convinced me to
    via u/[deleted]
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    let her email their supervisors "to remind them of proper conduct" and described their treatment of an "unnamed female student". She didn't name me, but they figured it out. They confronted me after class and asked my why I would report. their "silly joke". Apparently, their supervisors are now very cold towards
    via u/[deleted]
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    them and less interested in helping. It's not a formal complaint - only their supervisors know - but one of them, C, said his supervisor writes the reports for his financial aid/scholarship and it was my fault if he lost out on that. I now feel a bit embarrassed and this was compounded by a friend telling me I took it to far cause C shouldn't lose out on his scholarship. So, reddit - AITA? edit: grammer
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    thirdtryisthecharm Sultan of Sphincter [719] NTA Any retaliation should also be reported. They're angling for some big problems if they keep this up.
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    JungleKing65 Also I commend your courage in defending yourself. That takes tenacity!
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    GreaterAmberjack NTA - they know what they're doing because jokers like this have been doing it for years - undermine your accomplishments, question your abilities and then act shocked when you stand up for yourself. I'm
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    happy (and somewhat surprised) that the faculty and administration is treating this as seriously as it deserves. EDIT: Thank you for all the love! I'm not very good at Reddit and this is unprecedented!
    via u/GreaterAmberjack
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    anyoldname7 If their “pretty privilege joke” made you lose out on a scholarship or caused you to be graded extra hard, they wouldn't give it a c p. They intentionally and repeatedly made this "silly joke” out loud, in front of professors.
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    NTA. Maybe they should have thought about treating you with respect and professionalism BEFORE it had to come from a place of authority.
    via u/anyoldname7
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    Dittoheadforever Supreme Court Just- s [138] You're NTA and it wasn't a "silly ment joke." It was repeated har and constant implications that you're not worthy of your grades and haven't earned your way to where you are. You don't deserve that and it should have been
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    reported. It's a shame those guys are so insecure and jealous of your accomplishments, but any consequences that befall them are well earned.
    via u/Dittoheadforever
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    Ok_General_6940 Partassipant [3] NTA at ALL These men can't stand having a competent woman around. I have worked in a male dominated field for over a decade and I want to commend you on standing up for yourself.
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    This is bul it you shouldn't have to put up with and I'd start documenting everything. I'd also go talk to that first professor 1:1 and ask them not to announce your grades publicly again. I had to do that in my
    via u/Ok_General_6940
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    undergrad, and it helped immensely. Good luck OP, don't let these immature a ats chase you away from something you love.
    via u/Ok_General_6940
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    FiFi2789 Agree completely with you! Been working in a male dominated field for almost my whole career and I still get 'you don't know what it's like on site' and 'those aren't the regulations' even when I can point to the exact part of the legislation where it says that they are wrong/incompetent.
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    I've been asked if I slept my way into jobs, if my dad has anything to do with my career (he's a retired pub owner) and been asked if I was 'grumpy' because I was pregnant. No, I'm telling you to stop doing what you are doing because you are putting people in literal danger
    via u/FiFi2789
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    and need to stop it right now, I am more qualified than you. I could go on for hours with the bu it weak men have tried to pull on me over the years. There are good ones who don't take it and stand up for me, ones that would never treat me that way but the bad ones are LOUD.
    via u/FiFi2789
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    The only way to deal with m gyny is to shut it right down. This behaviour is not acceptable, and won't be tolerated in the workplace of any reputable company, their clients, or customers. Definitely document anything, and report
    via u/FiFi2789
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    to your professor that they confronted you about it and are blaming you for their actions (and reasonable consequences) now too and it is creating a h ile environment. NTA
    via u/FiFi2789

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